Periyar... The movie.

Well been thinking to update my blog right after the movie got over.... but took sometime to do it.

The movie started off portraying inital days of periyar and what made him take the rationalist path. Some people are not made they are born that way... I guess periyar is one such kind... as the movie progressed one could get a feel what kind of person periyar was... scene from movie: inspite of being a non-believer of rituals and all the supersition that existed in the society periyar successfully administrated the temple accounts... he says belief is different from management skills. This is responsibility and he does it with atmost sincerity.

Post interval the movie is at its best... one actually forgets the actors and gets a feel of watching periyar in real-time. kudos to the lead actor 'satyaraj' is has definitely done a great job.

I had my own mindset about periyar... but his thiniking is different and very genuine... i had 2 questions which had been in mind for a long time... why he said Indian Independence day is a black day in the history of India and why he actually got married to maniammai... The reason why he called Indian independence day as a black day is because "independence without social freedom is not really freedom" congress those days were only against British rule not against the social injustice that were prevailing and they were not interested in that at all... thatz the reason why periyar said independence without social freedom is not worth anything. made absolute sense to me. While I din't get strong reason why he did the later... Periyar was 60 when he got married to maniammai and he lived upto 90. the reason why maniammai joined periyar and helped him was to ensure he lived long enuf to serve the society which is a very valid cause and she lived upto it... it is because of her periyar managed to live a healthy until 90...

well a must see movie. What was more interesting is to watch the movie with people who enjoyed it more like how i did....

the only thing I felt would have added more value is that 'the incident should have been dated' was not able to relate to the year...

I wish someday My grandfather NSKrishana's life should also be picturized.

Life is beautiful...

with a very very heavy heart i start out to write this... It's because of the movie life is beautiful.
I started out to see the movie without knowing much about the story. I was thinking it would be one of the movies where miraculously people survive after bad times....

Half way thru' the movie i realised I'm definetly going to feel heavy. How stupid of me I thot hitler had is idedologies defined. And they did something that made sense from there point of view... I don't want to talk about what the jews did to the germans i'm sure it would have irked to form the nazi party... but then how valuable a life is a family is.... when my sister malar showed me the photographs of the hitler's concentration camp after her german trip i was shocked but i din't feel heavy.... after reading Anne Frank's diary I was wondering how it would have been for that girl but it would have definitely been like hell. A hell unimaginable.... A Hell, is that how you feel in a hell.... Hatsoff to the director and all the actors. having a son i some how related my self to the father in the movie.... But i think i would have lost hope for sure in life would have bought in the fear factor to my son also. Guido, this character has impressed me.

Between you and me blog I cud'nt control my self. I feel like crying out loud. Is it fate... if guido had hidden in with his son maybe he would have survived to see the sunshine.

Save the country from Industrial Waste.

Hi Ppl,
Last evening I had been to Alliance Francaise to check out the photography exhibition titled "Bhopal 1000". Followed by screen of the documentary "Hunting Anderson" (CEO of Union Carbide, chemical company reason for the Bhopal gas tragedy).

Well I dropped in because it was longtime since I had touched base with the art world. But it turned out to be a thought provoking evening. I happened to know a lot about gas tradegy. There were about 8000 poeple who were killed in this. Union Carbide the company which was responsible for this mishap had actually switched off most of the safety plant as a cost cutting measure on that particular night. India governement had put up a compensation case for 3billion and the UC has paid a fraction of it 470million. and the worst part is only a fraction of that has reached the the affected people...

The photo exhibition was not just to highlight what happened at bhopal but also to bring to light the problems faced due to industrial waste in places like cuddalore, mettur, manali etc. This was an awareness camp. I believe cuddalore is the most affected place in tamilnadu with these kind of industrial pollution. And governement is planning to setup couple of more industries in cudddalore.

The exhibition and documentary touched me for a lot of reasons, the most important one being am I not conscious about the nature and people around me? and I told to myself I will spread the awareness of industrial pollution and its adverse effect to people whom i know.

You can get more info about this in: http://www.sipcotcuddalore.com

There is an online petition which you can sign which is available at:
http://www.sipcotcuddalore.com/action.html

If you get the time please visit Alliance francaise, chennai. The exhibition is on until 11th. (11 am-7pm)

Icons... the first most usable icon design - Susan Kare.

This afternoon I was surfing to web focusing mostly on icon design. There poped-up Susan Kare's website.... like usual i saw the portfolio (i believe in "see it to believe it") but to my surprise i ended up seeing some single bitmap icons.... like the ones you see in MS paint. i was laughing at the portfolio thinking to myself... what the heck somebody as actually dared to put stuff as primitive as this and claims that to be there portfolio... but to my surprise when i read the description at the base... it read like this "created for Apple corporation in the year 1983. I was like give me a break!. I got so hooked on i saw the entire portfolio and moved on to read about Susan Kare. Here's a portion from her bio data:

"Susan Kare received a B.A., summa cum laude, from Mount Holyoke College, and an M.A. and Ph.D. in fine arts from New York University. In 1989, she was a founding partner of Susan Kare LLP. She is a 2001 recipient of the Chrysler Design Award.

read more at: http://www.kare.com/design_bio.html

If i'm asked to do a design (not just me all designers for that matter) the first thing I will tend to do is look for reference :(. I'm kinda trying to put myself in kare's shoes 24 years back creating something out of nothing... unimmaginable. I've become a great admirer of Susan Kare.

Awesome. I felt i have learnt something worthwhile... while sometimes you tend to get carried away with all peer pressure.... meaning whats your friend's designation in another company, how much does she get paid. we kind of fail to get in terms with the fact that all of that is just a superficial hype. I believe in good design, creative design and simple... similar to the ideologies of susan ;). Suddenly I felt a sense of confidence I can do far far better than what I'm doing. There is more to my career than just designations and money.

Got her mail ID from the site... I think I'm going to mail her and tell how nice i felt knowing about her.

Wow i've become a frequenter to blog spot.

mmm... is it because these days i have an opinion in things around it... maybe i do. Well its ok if nobody wants to listen. You are there bloggy i can count on you.

Here you go.... there are 2 things i would like to discuss with you.

a. Why is it that men take women for granted??? is it because thatz the way they are brought up in India.... not really this trend is there across countries... I have read somewhere that in primitive days matriarchy was the thing... as a human being man used to wonder how on earth does this woman deliver a one more of our kind.... and gradually as days went by he started realizing it is he who is responsible and ever since that i guess he had started to revole things around him.... so why did i actually talked about this.... just remembered (i sincerely wish there was a time machine which will enable me to travel time backwards)

so here's the thing :) 2 incidents 2 days just to re-ensure the fact that i'm a man and you do things my way. sometimes i feel like laughing at there attitude sometimes i think it is the fault of the society which has actually brought them up like that.... now i'm a part of this society... can i make a difference i genuinely will make a difference 'cos i have a son i will make sure that i give him exposure to a woman's point of view.... well it's upto to him to take it or not. lets see how it goes...

b. Today a colleague of mine told me eating animals (chicken, mutton etc) does not fall under cruelity towards animal.... does it not?

If killing is not good then i guess that holds good to even plants. Y'day i saw this program on discovery which showed a small seed growing into a plant it was all continuos guess they would have had the camera rolling continuously for about 3 days atleast. It does have life it actually had put so much effort to come out from under the ground just because it can't move doesn't mean they don't live. All these people who preach vegetarianism convinently eat stuff which has life and cnsistently make fun of non-vegetarians and how creul they are.

Now my only logic towards building a food habit for my son is concentrate on health more than anything else. I don't intend to give him mutton i don't see any value as food to be taken in except taste but fish is different it has good proteins which i guess my son will need. thatz the point of arguement i always end up having with my husband... because he preaches vegetarianism and i'm very sure that rice which is rich in carbohydrate need not be taken in the quantity we take in... it is of no use... but we still keep eating it 'cos we are used to that food habit... so really the point is eat good healthy food period.

coming back to cruelty part... you know what is worser than getting killed living as a cripple for life... I hope that doesn't happen to the dog in our office (well that is a big story... someother time bloggy)

got to go now.

weekend was good...

lot of thing to tak about. I had gone to a tamil movie Paruthi veeran. the storyline was simple... when the movie got over it really din't leave a trail in me... but as you keep thinking about u.... it really makes one think. Sometimes people are so carefree including me simply because if we get into trouble it is ok we really don't get hurt... 'cos it s just me in trouble but when it happens to our loved ones it shatters us completely. Now thatz the storyline. kuddos to the debut actir karthi but more than him i guess it is a directors film....

It turned out to be a confident weekend for me... i was absolutely non-dependant on anybody i just enjoyed my weekend. I slept like a log which i guess i missed doing for sometime now. The luxury of going to my house i guess...

Dreamzzzzzz......

Is my dream dorm or gone once for all.... yeah it has become dreamzzzz... dozed off really.
Well lemme explain. This afternoon i was reading the Brand Equity of ET. There was an article about a creative guy who has made it big in this industry Bogusky. i forgot his first name.... his name has been joined as a part of the company name.... His company is Crispin Potter + bogusky.

He started to work for crispin potter growed gradully up worked for brands like IKEA and lot of other international brands has won cannes ad awards too.... he was featured in BE because he is on the otherside of the table this year at cannes....

over to my flash back.... I want to be in the entertainment industry specifially ad film making... i know i have the creative ability to be there of course I would require some fine tunning.... back in college too thatz what i wanted to do.... but I gave up. and until today i haven't faced the reality that I have lost it for making it big in the ad world.... whats wrong with me am i the HEM (thanks for shanmu to for that mail that reminded me on who moved my cheese) not willing to change comfortable with what i have and just keep following the flow.

We had this discussion about what the other person's aim was... most of them ended up saying I want to have a peaceful life.... agreed. Thatz is what even i want. peace and happiness does that mean we stay as is go on and do nothing to prove your fullest potential??? isn't that mediocre attitude? Well I say it is for teju that i'm hanging on and ofcourse this US thing coming up. i should seriously give it a time with in my mind... if it doesn't look any good within the the defined time i should move on.... thatz a thought which i got just now as i'm writing the blog. maybe I shoud think more in that line and get some time frames defined. I don't want to be HEM.

One mroe big event in my house.... my younger sister's wedding... waht an event with all faces smiling my bil tied the sacred thread on her... oh how i wished i had a wedding as simple and as neat as this one... well whats over is over.... but see even after 2 full years that longing for having a wedding ceremony which you would cherish is there....

hey i seriously need counselling...

i want someone to take care of my child.... really. I'm not able to concentrate in work ever since i moved in here. men are very selfish... bloggy i hope you are not a guy. Have started thinking if i should give up my career for the sake of my child... my job involves thinking... if i can't think then what is the point getting paid. am not being selfish... from morning no... i have not done anything productive... my mind is breaking... hey wait a minute... i just spoke with a friend was very close to me during my college days... guess he is the only person whom i can be little open with these days. he is nice... unconditional friend. just felt like telling about him. feeling better now. bloggy why am i having this mood swing. This blog has become like my personal diary which i din't want it to be...

anyways. life hasn't changed a bit. few decisions change our life completely... :(

Is it convenience or good time... that matters...

wondering what... u have become my only friend these days with whom i can open up completely.... mainly because you can only listen and not talk back. few days ago i had to attend function formality sake at 5 in the morning when i asked whether it can be rescheduled... they gave me all crap about auspicious time and all that crap and it cannot be changed. well i din't bother to argue and change 'cos i don't have any sentiments about it... and as long as my son is not going to be tortured touring around i don't have a problem... now they are calling up and saying timing is changed to 9. point number 1... what happen to the auspicious time funda??? the it seems the carpenter has said work will not get over until 9 so the time is changed. So time is always available... we have to choose depending on our convenience... some people just don't get it in their heads... y am i becoming the scape goat always. I'm in worst of my mood... need to relax. some decisions change our life completely... can't tell u more. bye.

chill bloggy... here's a funny event.

y'day i had to interview couple of people to replace the designers who are quiting my organisation. there was this character who came in for the interview, his profile seemed to look like he has lot of experience. Well he looked very profound too... as we started to chat he made me feel like as though i was on the other side of the table... i asked him what are the questions you will ask before you start a website design... he said "questions meaning..." i had to gve him an example like say "what does the site deal with" he said oh... then he is looking at me a smiling and asking me what else... i think thatz all i will ask... i said what about who the user is... he said yeah.... what else thatz all... i cudn't help laughing.... he was rejected right away. but if i think of that interview session i can't help laughing.

hi.... i've become such a boring person these days. have also developed sharp tongue. I hate people. i look back and wonder what kind of person i was in life... jovial fun loving, friendly, lovable... but these days. S*** is not the word. why am i feeling so old and miserable. i only like to stay inside my house. thats the only place i'm feeling comfortable with.

yeah my son seems to be my only consolation... of course not to mention my sis shan and my mum. even with her i go over board. take her for a hike. i feel silly. sometimes i hurt her so much she actually doesn't mistakes me... but next moment i feel bad... this is not me... where is the real me. i feel like going out of station somewhere a place where i don't know anyone. but i'm not able to do that... i need a's permission, b's permission. i hate that.

Sometime back i had all the freedom in the world to go out anywhere come in anytime... have fun... but those days i prefered to be at home. now i want to do all these things but i'm not getting a chance. This is not what i wanted out of life... but y god....

today someone i knew by just name introduction called me... i was such a mess over the phone. she would have thought why the heck she called me... you know the worst part is i don't care what she thinks about me. i'm happy if she doesn't call me again also. i have started hating to socialise with people around me. where am i heading...

search....

These days i feel an emptiness within me. Darkness. I'm searching for guru... not exaclty guru but a guide sorts or whatever you name it... someone who has experienced what i am experiencing... emptiness. I think i'm attracted by Osho and his ideologies. Have started to read a book authored by him called 'Courage - the joy of living dangerously' the foreword matches what i'm expecting out of this book. let see how it goes.

hey bloggy....

its me again. well not to crib about others. its about me. I keep telling myself don't crib about others but i stil do that. bad mouthing if i have to be literal. Y do i do that... i like to talk to my creator sometimes... I'm not bad but my feelings are so rusted these days. I'm losing patients...
while i sincerely try to stay cool it doesn't happen. will time heal.. I doubt.

hey... y is that i always remember you when i have a problem and when i don't have ahuma company to share it with. I guess i feel like talking... and really i want someone who will just listen and not start to blurt out their profound advice based on their intutions... seriuosly i don't want any advice from anyone... If a person is doing something wrong to i guess he knows it is wrong and wudn't require a third person to say it is wrong...

things havn't changed much since my last post. when i was feeling really low y'day din;t know whom to talk with suddenly remembered this page, my own page. the only change i have from what i wrote last is that. I am a mother now and that does not change my character and attitude completly.

work seems to be fine like always but it is just my personal life which is always on toss... boy i can't tell more. remember i decided this is not going to be my personal diary...

hey blog spot.... just you and me after a long time... you know now i have a kutty son. he has just completed 3 months :) I feel like a proud mother whenever this guy smiles at me. he is really sweet. Tejas is his name.

adventurous and rewarding dream....

Ok where do i start i erally don't know. 'cos i don't know the beginning. All I cud remember was I was running with a 20rs note in my hand. and i knew where i was going. It was a part of a major witness for some criminal bribery case. If the number in the bill matches the number in the money which was bribed then someone (not sure who) a bigshot would be proved guilty. So I was running fast because the court wass in the verge of acquitting this person and landed up on time to prove him guilty. While i was running to the court that 20rs bill fell on a drainage and i think i got down the drainage to get it. Finally after all the court thing was over. Of course my timely evidence saves the day. I'm kind of surrounded with my relatives who start to appreciate me for being so brave or rather becoming popular by doing this. while we were talking a 5rs note goes and falls inside the drainage i jump immediately to take that. one of my unc says you have become so brave... I reply him in a jocular way no ihave experience jumping into drainage and he laughs. and their ends my dream... silly eh ;)

weird dreams continue....

ok. This is a dream which i had the day before y'day. Vaguely remember the dream starting like this.... My husband and I went on a honey moon to srilanka... so that was the place where I was in my dream. But it just din't look like srilanka... subconsciously (in my dream) I felt that place was srilanka. We were staying in a hotel very close to the beach. so close that actually u step out of the boat it is the backyard of your alloted room. Suddenly we had t vacate the room and we left all our bag and baggaes and started to row towards the otherside of the shore. My husband after reaching the shore complains "how can u forget our baggages go get it... so I rowed back to the srilankan hotel or rather the resort to get our stuff... but the room which we were staying in has been rented out to someother couple. I ask their permission to get my stuff and packed everything and left to where my husband was standing. ofcourse rowing all by myself.

Now the shore looked very different from what i saw before... but it just blended in. It looked more like an elephant camp where unwanted elephants were shot down... My husband and I suddenly realised that our pet elephant which we actually took along to srilanka is one among the elephant which are lined to be killed. My pet elephants name is "Chidambaram" (I real don't know what kind of pet name that is and that too for an animal like elephant) So this is the scene... A lot of elephants keep running put of fear to be killed and their is this lady who's got the revolver pointed at the elephant... but u know what she is just some kind of sadistic pleassure but giving a physco terror to those elephants. Finally I reach the spot and start shouting for my pet "Chidambaram" and their came my pet with all tear and terror filled eyes. He hugs me with his trunk and I ask him to give a hug to my husband and my kid(I actually don't have one now, but expecting) chidambaram hugged us with so much love and again he ran into the jungle knowing he would be killed. How mean of me I let him go in. But i was feeling heavy.

I woke up. That poor fellow chidambaram's face is still in my mind.

Unlike my prev blog....

Well I'm kind of absolutely feeling normal and good. It is really funny to be a human. Ain't it. Nothing comes from within you. Everything seems to be driven from outside. Like you get excited when someone compliments u for a work or ur dress and if somebody criticizes u for the same work or dress u get putoff badly. Why does that happen?

Which of my the feeling belongs to me. nothing actually. will continue later....

And gayathri it was not you whom my prev blog was targeted at. :)

Well... here goes my second. today i feel like writing about relationships. Are we behaving rudely with people. or do they irk us to behave so????

I really don't know. Why is that sometime when we see some people we cud feel our blood boiling literally. Is there a way i can come over it?

If u succeed in doing that tell me how. can't tell anything more really otherwise wud end up looking like my personal diary on that web. Which i have consciously decided not to be.